If, god forbid, I was only allowed one dildo for the rest of my life, there’s a good chance I might pick the VixSkin Mustang. But I’m shuddering at the thought, so I’ll move on. The Mustang is something of a hallowed object in the world of sex toy reviewers. When this toy arrived at my door, I proclaimed it Read More

Apollo the Chimera from Bad Dragon seems to have a personality all its own. Covered in quirky texture, I don’t know why but it always seems in a happy mood. I’m not one for humanizing sex toys—but there’s something sweet, endearing, and maybe a little odd about the design. What is the Apollo the Chimera and what is it supposed Read More

I sat staring at my brand new Stronic Drei. As it lay charging, a quiet terror overtook me. What have I done? I thought, stricken with fear. What if the Eins really was better? What if this locked behind my pubic bone with grizzly bear force? What if…I made a major mistake? I was nervous Read More

What is it and what is it supposed to do? The Bodywand by X Gen is a wand style vibrator. Like the Magic Wand Original, it plugs into the wall, makes a lot of noise, and is ridiculously powerful. It can be used for your back, or your peep. You can also use it internally Read More

Why do I have a Pure Wand you ask? Because I trust Epiphora with my cunt. The lot of it. She didn’t steer me wrong with my most cherished Comet Wand and with the Pure Wand she guided to me to light. The light of stainless steel. The light of G-Spot magic. The light of slick subltey and Read More

What is it? What’s it supposed to do? The Wet for Her Five is a dildo that comes in three different sizes. I chose the Medium, because I think I may have internalized the story of The Three Bears. Wet for Her is a US based company (though it was started in France) that is aimed Read More

Never before has a sex toy inspired me to write trashy inter-housal Harry Potter fan fiction like Scorn the Wyvern from Bad Dragon. “50 POINTS FOR GRYFFINDOR,” I exclaimed on Instagram when Scorn arrived. And though I’m a Slytherin myself (I got that ambition, baby), I salivated at the sight of this short, chunky, crazily textured new dick from Read More

Of course the We-Vibe Touch is great for my peep, it’s shaped just like a scoop! The Touch is made from body safe, non porous glossy silicone, which means that lint clings to it like all hell. Seriously, I can never have more than 3.5 seconds of lint free-ness. The gloss is nice, however, as Read More

The Lelo Mia 2 damn near broke my heart. I tried to prepare myself, tried to steady my anxieties when I found out that the tapered end is not the end meant to be used. I slowly chanted this information (that the tapered end covers the USB port and was not an answer to my prayers for Read More

Today I’d like to spend some time talking about my favorite toy: the Magic Wand Original, formerly known as the Hitachi. When I tell my partner to “Grab the vibrator” or my partner asks me if I’d like them to “grab the vibrator,” we’re both referring to the Magic Wand. In my household, the Magic Wand Read More